Monday 17 July 2023

Manchester Dreaming

The Ashes 2023 press pack are quite a dreary bunch and I should know because I’m one of them. They invariably hunt & write as a pack. From the first time I sat in the press box at Lords for a long-forgotten B&H final I have always marvelled at the way a group of individually very articulate journos manage to fine tune their language in a way that makes them virtually interchangeable. The collective viewpoint invariably holds sway. 

There are notable exceptions, Mike Atherton & Gideon Haigh (who was a key contributor to JM96* back in the day) are two of the more individual thinkers, whose insights and perspective are to be carefully followed and cogitated on. The majority of the others fall into two packs, the bitter Englishmen and the one-eyed Aussies, both of whom thrash away in their own safe space before gently slipstreaming into a mutually agreed position. 

 

Current thinking is that England have backed themselves into a corner and go into the Old Trafford test without a Test level no. 3, having selected Moeen Ali to clog up that space on the scorecard and by picking Jimmy Anderson to replace the back spasm prone Olly Robinson. Thus, leaving England with one of the oldest bowling opening pairs in cricket history (again)!

 

In fact, the numbers might well suggest that Mo is a weak link given his 13.14 average batting at first drop, he has barely played any red ball cricket and even at the height of his test career he always looked better lower down the order. A left-hander with some glorious strokes in his portfolio but a man prone to succumb sooner rather than later to temptation. 

 

As for England’s most successful Test bowler of all time, it’s true that Jimmy has also battled to impose himself on the Aussies so far in this series. However, I could prattle on about the pitches at Edgbaston & Lords, but I’ll spare you the effort. If you want that head over to CricketGroupThink.com (C/O; Fleet St, SMHacks). Quite honestly though… who cares?

 

The truth of the matter is cricket is the ultimate dream sport. No other game embraces the past, the history, tradition and collective memory as much as cricket, whilst at the same time it relentlessly tweaks the present with an unblinking (if not always focussed) eye on the future. Cricket spectators, writers, administrators and players are all helpless dreamers.

 

Our Dreams (or nightmares) about that missed catch, that rash shot, that glorious innings, that club cricket tour that only lasted one over (with the rest of the time spent in the hotel bar watching Botham comeback from a drugs bar), that frightening spell by the demon quick, that plan to make cricket an Olympic Sport (again – NB. The Great Britain XI are the reigning Olympic Champions – that’s 123 years unbeaten!!) etcetera, are the essence of cricket!

 

A game without dreams can hollow out our soul, just ask anyone who had to tolerate a team lead by Don Revie, or another turgid one-nil to the Arsenal performance, or the 70’s/80’s win at all costs All Blacks, or the grinding cynicism of Argentina 1990, or Australia at Newlands 2018. Dream killers one and all. 

 

How does that relate to the 4th Test? Simple – The dream goes like this. 

 

On a murky Manchester morning…

 

Stokes flips the 50p he cadged off Baz in the dressing room before heading out, Cummins calls ‘Heads’, the coin lands tails on grass. Australia had considered batting but decide to insert (a twofold rationale, the weather and to blunt the English penchant for chasing down any score imaginable). 

 

The ball starts hooping around from the off. England are 3 down within an hour, 5 by lunchtime for a paltry sixty-something. The sun bursts over Old Trafford, like a Johnny Marr riff shimmering in the heavens. Moeen Ali (dropped off only his second delivery) has managed to cling on, more by dint of avoiding the strike than anything else. 

 

But now, with Mancunian voices filling the air with encouragement, he starts to compile the innings of his life, from nudge & nurdle, he starts to glide and caress and finally slap and crack the ball to all parts of the ground. His century comes up in the second over after tea, a slog sweep off the hapless Aussie part time spinner and former captain.

 

England are finally all out in the 5th over of the 3rd day’s play (rain having washed out all of day 2). The ball is given to Jimmy Anderson, he walks back to his mark at the James Anderson end, he stops briefly, he turns and sets off…

 

The dream is alive! 

 

Jack Nash

18/7/23

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